Momentary Joy

Momentary Joy
I am a father. My gospel
Is laughter, fingers in
My daughters knotty hair,
Tight hugs for my grinning son,
And saying “I love you”
Ten thousand times a day,
Every day, ferocious,
Urgent love. Eliya is only
Four, and I can already
See her walking down the aisle,
In my heart, and my heart
Feels the thunder of seconds
Stampeding us all to future days.
And so I love hard. Tickle often.
Zerbert now and then. Let their
Laughter rain on my face, and I dance,
Collecting every drop.

We were stopped at a stoplight
And I looked back in the van
To see the innocent eyes
Of my children gazing into mine,
And I almost cried.

Couldn’t stop
Looking back at them,
Looking forward, checking the light,
Looking back at them,
Looking forward, checking the light,

Looking back longer than I should,
In danger of stopping traffic and
Making people mad.

And one day there will only be
Looking back.

Rear view mirrors in the form
Of vinyl photo albums with clingy,
Shiny pages.

And the light turns green.
I tear my eyes forward
And life pushes my foot on the gas
Eyes forward, tears in my eyes.

Savoring this momentary joy,

With the grief that it is
Momentary
Joy.